Episodes


Throwing it all the way back today to a time of stress and tootsie rolls. We’ll get to know each other a little bit and also go over the correct procedure for creating the perfect set of bitchin 80’S bangs. 

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Awe man. For this episode we discuss the lengths that we go to for attention, and in Crystal’s case, the attention of one specific 2nd grader. Join us for some epic fails, and big laughs. 

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Change is hard, especially for a kid. In this story I look back and the before and after of a big move, and relive some truly painful and wonderful moments.

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Grab some pantyhose and can of Aquanet. In this episode of Eat Life we see the Wonderful World of Child Beauty Pageants thru Crystals’s, young, awkward eyes. Artwork

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Birds, Bees, History, and a maturity bitch slap. Join me for a maturity shit show and try not to smile. I dare you!  

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Who’s got weird family traditions? Walk with me through a year of holiday fun as a kid. 

Get in loser, we’re going on a Nostalgic Road Trip. Breaking laws, Skiing fails, Horror movies, and roller coasters… good times.

Getting festive this week! Let see if we watched the same obscure Christmas and TV shows. 

Come and Hang out me and my Gal Pals as we do some drinking and take a look at some of the old Christmas Toys that we loved, and had forgotten. 

Well, we are now 3-4 bottle of wine deep and it’s gettin festive. This week we move past the top selling toys we knew, and on to the one we remember. Let’s go. 

In this final part of the Christmas Special, we finish up looking at toy we knew, and then talk about the one toy that we wanted above all others, and then somehow got, on Christmas morning.

What Happens when you FINALLY make some friends? Let’s find out. I’ll take you back thru “being cool,” the video store, and Books that took me FAR FAR away from here.

Cross Dressing, Boy/girl parties, and reality checks. It’s a mixed bag of memories that make us who we are.

The old lady episode is here ! Where I get real crotchety and talk about they ways we used to communicate.

Let go back to the movies! Where I talk about sneaking crap in, what was legit to watch in the 80’s, and lots and lots of theater hopping… with my mom…. 

Listen. Summer is real hot, and we had to do SOMETHING to pass the time…. OK. Day Time Talk shows it is… I hope you brought a helmet! lol. Let.s go!  

The OH-Lympics! Let take a look back at something that we USED to care alot about, The Olympic games. What happened to them? What lessons did we learn? What movies pushed us to dream Olympic dreams? Let’s find out!

Hey, let’s go to the Mall. Do you think your mom could drive us? I need a new bottle of Gap Dream… 

Join me and my special guest The Hubbs, as we talk about some of the stupidest S**** EVER that we once thought was awesome. We sound like we are super drunk here, but we are not….. that’s just our relationship… so Happy Valentines Day! .. 

Just when you thought I could not possibly be ANY weirder, I take you on a audio field trip, playing back thru some of the early computer games from our first family computer. And MS-DOS 5.0. This part 1 of 2 folks, so there is more shameless nerd culture to come!

We are back to being SUPER nerdy in the 2nd part of this MS-DOS episode where I : take all my patreons on the Oregon Trail, disappoint Rockapella, spend way too much time on Trolls, engage in Tank warfare, and kill some natzi’s and aliens that had it coming. ..like ya do…  

In episode 18 we are taking a look at the Movie Bullies we all know and Love to Hate from the 80’s and 90’s. We answer 3 questions for each of them: How evil were they on a scale of 1-10? What is their tragic backstory, or do we have to make one up? Did they learn a lesson, or go unpunished?

Lets walk hand and hand with Robert Stack back thru some of my fav Unsolved Mysteries episodes: The Rain Man, The Allagash Abductions, The Ice Woman, Black Hope Curse, and Diana Roberston. Join me. 

Some people get it, some don’t. I am Some Don’t.

Listen as Kenny and I bullshit for almost an hour about being a kid, sneaking cigarettes, kick ass teachers, and we even get in a time machine together… join us.

I sat down with Katie from The Haunted Heart Podcast and some things happened: A cheerleader fist fight, animated crushes, and a ride in a time machine. Let’s go.

We are lacing up and skating out! Also.. first kisses don’t always go as planned…

In this episode I am taking you back thru some of the things that we REALLY thought were true…. at the time….let’s just say that we’ve learned a lot and been lied to more than once.

Nicole and I have our Jammies on, our hair in rollers, and our mudmasks are in place. We are dishing on old times, Boy Posters that made our wall, And important things to say to your “little self.” Join us.

I’m hanging with Sarah from The Homance Chronicles. We are talking about Drugs, evil neighborhood kids, dating the homeless, and Cartwheels. You’re gonna wanna here this. Just sayin. 

Well, it’s a few days late, because… reasons… but here you go! Today I take you back thru some of the game shows we watched as kids, either gathered up with the family, or if you pulled off playing sick and got to watch these from the couch in the middle of the day. 

So this is the first in a series that will be ONLY on patreon going forward. Only the first taste is free. So head over to Patreon.com/eatlifepodcast if you crave MORE! In this series I take a chapter by chapter look at the old Fear Street Novels by R.L. Stine. It’s a good time. Also, I recorded this on the day that I picked up my dog from being spayed, and she is being super needy because of all the drugs. I kept it in.. * remember to spay and neuter your pets yall. * 

Come with Allyson and I as we laugh thru: medical mushroom cuts, TRL, Sister Frame ups, and Awkward Spice. I am sorry for the amount of laughter. but not really. 

We are looking at best friends from pop culture and also a call to mine. 

I am back to playing the MS DOS games we used to know and love, but THIS time, thanks to listener request, I am playing some of the games that were made for DOS and based on popular movies of the 80’s and 90’s. In this first part of the episode I am attempting for the first time: Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Batman, Batman Returns, The Neverending Story II, and Top Gun: Danger Zone. It’s a Dumpster Fire, but it’s ours… So circle up nerds, let’s do this. 

2nd round of Playing MSDOS game based on the movies we knew and loved from the 80s and 90s! This week I’m checking out Home Alone, Back to the Future 2, Back to the Future 3, Gremlins, Gremlins 2, and Terminator 2: Judgment Day. Some times it works and others… not so much. So lets do this. 

Last Call Nerds! You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here. Just kidding, you can stay. In the last leg of the MS DOS series of games based on movies, i’m getting a little critical, cause some of these were aweful… I’m playing: Willow, Waynes World, Goonies, Nightmare on Elm Street, and Hook. Lets. Do. This.

The Gal Pals are BAAACCCKK! We are drinking wine, playing mash, and getting inappropriate..  *** WARNING*** Not for kids! Candid conversations on sex, bodyparts, and other offensive stuff.. so if your easily Triggered… maybe skip these. 

Just when you thought we could not get drunker, dirtier, or more obnoxious….we can, and we did. Enjoy this second part where I get my MASH read, and we play a collective game of Monster Mash… *** WARNING**** not for kids! and prob most adults if we are honest… 

it’s. So. HOT. So today I want to look at the things that we used to do to beat the heat. I’m Talking: Sprinklers, Water balloons, The Super Soaker, Popsicles, Making Popsicles, snow cones, and Slush Puppies. 

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